


his saviours

by vilokent



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, lots of connverse, steven and connie are dating, steven gets a therapist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-11
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:20:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23599726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vilokent/pseuds/vilokent
Summary: after years of helping people, steven undergoes months of therapy and support.
Relationships: Amethyst & Steven Universe, Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe
Comments: 2
Kudos: 60





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> steven has his first appointment.

he could feel the tension rising from the moment he walked in.

therapy was something he never had. he was always the person who gave it to others, and fixed their issues without worrying about his own. it didn’t concern him back then. his problems where never identified. 

after his emotional breakdown, he felt drained and broken. it was at that time that he realised that he was damaged. his mentality took a huge hit in the stomach after that, and he spent a lot of his time in his bedroom feeling like trash.

the woman who was supposedly his therapist motioned for him to sit down. he chose to sit on the chair nearest to the door incase he needed to leave at any point.

“good afternoon steven. my name is Dr.L. i hope we can get along well.” she smiled, offering a handshake to the hybrid. he returned it, wanting to make a kind impression.

“now could you please tell me some things about you so i can get to know you more?” not wanting to seem uncomfortable, he nodded as to say yes to her statement

“u-um.....my name is steven universe. my full name is longer, but i’m not gonna say it aloud. i have a girlfriend named connie, i live right next to the beach and my dad lives in his van, whilst i live in a house with three gems i consider my family.” he tried to give enough detail without diving in

“thank you. its wonderful to hear that you have people in your life. “ the doctor stated

“dr maheswaran has already sent me some information regarding your past trauma” she lifted up a clipboard “from what it seems, you have suffered mostly mentally. unfortunately however, i cannot perform any diagnosis for any sort of medical problems you might have, but i have an idea of what you may be suffering with already”

steven felt himself almost glowing, but managed to restrain it.

“so...y-you have an idea of what i may have?” he questioned 

“yes...i believe you may be suffering with some form of post traumatic stress disorder, but i will make sure i am able to conclude anything else with your father through an email” she concluded

he sighed.. he really didn’t think stuff would be this bad..

“..am i gonna be like this forever?.. y'know..broken?”

“steven...you may have issues that are hard to deal with, but they are also a step by step towards improvement. the fact that you agreed to having therapy shows that you are already a few steps away from recovery. of course we cannot fix what traumatised you..but we can help you find ways to cope with your memories.”

he felt a sudden wave of relief pass over him for some reason, but did not know the reason. therapy suddenly didn’t feel like a force, it felt like something that could help him.

“..really? i can get better from this?”

“of course you can...it might take a while but, you can do it if you believe in yourself, and take away the help you get to boost your confidence.”

the rest of the session, steven told his new therapist more about himself. about his life, connie and the friends who he made among the years of his existence.

when the clock reached his limit, he eventually had to return home. he still felt a little shaky and nervous, but not as much as he was before. he drove himself home, recollecting what had happened.

arriving home, amethyst was the first person he saw. she seemed to notice his change of emotion from the past few weeks

“sup man, was therapy good? you seem more cheerful.” he smiled and sat next to her on the couch. 

“yeah...i really needed it. i think it’ll help me get better.” 

“bro that’s good! you’re gonna get better, trust me!” she exclaimed with slight enthusiasm. steven knew it would take him a while to recover. this was only the first step, and there would probably be more things to learn.

but, he was willing to do it. not for anyone else’s sake, but his own.


	2. friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steven talks to the cool kids for the first time in a while.
> 
> (chapter contains panic attack/flashbacks)

ever since the graduation ceremony that had happened for little homeschool, steven hadn’t seen the cool kids as much. he considered them friends, since they were genuine and kind people. but he felt as if he should talk with them more.

Jenny and her sister still worked at fish stew pizza since it was family business, so he assumed she would be there as usual. Sour cream would most likely be in the arcade or hanging around his dad, and he wasn’t sure where buck usually spent his time.

it turns out that they where at fish stew pizza together. Steven desperately wanted to talk to them about what went on at his therapy session, but he was afraid that he could easily screw it up instantly by remembering his past trauma.

he thought for a moment- and remembered what bismuth had said that time at the roller skating rink. connie was still his friend, and wanted to hang out with him. otherwise, why would she? even though they started dating, he knows that she still cares enough to stick around.

this was a similar situation, except he didn’t have bismuth as his moral support. he wanted to improve his relationship with his human friends, and attempt to explain what happened with him.

hesitating slightly, he stepped inside.

“Steven, what a suprise! i haven’t seen you since last month!” he turned his head to see none other than Jenny, Sour Cream and Buck Dewey. they where each sat on a chair around a regular sized table. buck grabbed another chair for steven, placing it next to him

“sooo...how have you been? last time we saw you, you seemed kinda stressed!” 

steven didn’t know what to say, and realised that whatever he planned to say was related to his trauma. he couldn’t just say he was fine, because the last time he did, he wasn’t. 

“umm...not exactly great.” the smile on jenny’s face became opposite 

“oh...”

sour cream stood up and placed his hands on the table

“...steven” he said calmly “one of your friends- i think the purple one? said you where having a hard time.” 

“so...we wanna help. in some way at least.”

he didn’t know the right way to react. last month, he trapped everyone in his stupid dome because he was scared. because he didn’t want lars to leave. because he messed up, he was an idiot, a fraud, a mon-

“steven? steven, breath..breathe cmon”

realisation kicked in, as he found himself having a panic attack. after his meltdown from two weeks ago, he started having them. they became hard to deal with. his tears kept coming, as jenny was motioning him to control his breathing. eventually, he calmed

“dude...you don’t need to tell us yet. it’s okay man” buck reassured 

“yeah, heck-you don’t need to tell us if you don’t feel comfortable. but we’re gonna try and be here for you, one step of the way, alright.”

a couple of seconds later, steven felt himself being in the middle of a group hug. he felt so many emotions, so many feelings.

“hey...why don’t we go out for an evening drive? im sure my dad won’t mind me using the car..i hope” jenny asked 

steven sniffled “s-sure i guess..” 

Buck helped steven out of his chair, since the panic attack caused him to become slightly unbalanced. they then walked outside, and sat in the car.

“steven? can i ask you something?” jenny asked politely

“go ahead, im all ears.” 

“..how did you deal with everything? at such a young age...it must of put so much on you...”

steven looked at the sky, and eventually figured out a response 

“i guess it was because..despite everything, i still had a family, friends and people who loved me. i think it got to a point where i couldn’t bear fixing things...fixing homeworld and helping people recover from trauma when i had my own..”

he closed his eyes, as jenny started the car. the wind felt really nice, and felt calming too...

“y’know universe...you’re a brave kid. your gonna get better with the baby steps your taking.”

the hybrid smiled at sour cream. as he realised that he was overthinking this visit for nothing. he felt better after the therapy session the other day, but this helped him too.

he could feel himself becoming free.


	3. visiting the universe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steven spends the day in bed. connie visits him and asks him a question.
> 
> (fluff and connverse in this chapter)

he switched on the nearby lamp, since it began to get dark outside. steven decided to spend the day in bed...because why not? he needed time to rest. pearl had made him breakfast, lunch and even dinner, which he was very thankful for. she didn’t have to, but it was obvious that she wanted to.

his phone was charging next to him as he felt himself drifting off to sleep. he had been talking to lars about possibly baking something with him in a few days, as he thought he would enjoy making something new. lars had suggested some very smart ideas.

other than that...his day was not overly terrible. he felt himself glowing pink at times, and had some flashbacks. but not as often as the previous week. when jenny, buck and sour cream went out with him yesterday, they said he could give one of them a phone call if he needed.

his phone rang, connie was calling-

ah, she was coming over today! steven facepalmed- how could he forget? he swiped on answer and pressed the device to his ear.

“Steven! i’m at your door! why haven’t you answered? i’ve been here knocking for the last ten minutes! are you okay??”

crap he thought. 

“s-sorry connie..i was kinda falling asleep. i’ll come there now..k?”

he ended their phone call and headed to the front door. he then opened it revealing none other than connie.

“biscuit, if your tired i can come back tomorrow-“

“no no no! its okay! i want you to stay!” he pleaded. she sighed, a small smile forming on her face.

“alright i’ll stay. i can’t say no to that face” steven smiled and lead her upstairs. he sat down on his bed, as she sat next to him. 

“..so” she started “i heard you started seeing a therapist..how’s it been going?”

he put his head on her shoulder and looked up at the ceiling 

“it’s been okay. a bit nerve racking at first, but it was alright” he confessed

connie smiled. she was glad he was at least making some sort of effort to get the help he needed. she then suddenly remembered the question she was going to ask him

“that’s good!” she exclaimed with enthusiasm “um...sorry to change the subject..but can i ask you something?”

“sure, go ahead! i’m all ears”

he’ll probably say no. this is to soon for him, it’s been four weeks already and that’s nowhere near enough time for him she thought.

“so um” she began “my..school is having a dance soon..and it would be weird for me to be alone there. i know you’re still recovering from a few weeks ago, and you don’t have to say yes but um.....will you accompany to the dance?”

she closed her eyes quickly, not wanting to hear or see his response, until he touched his hand onto her cheek and smiled. their noses touched, as he gave her a little smile.

“berry...i’m gonna be honest.” steven put his free hand onto hers “we wont get to see each other as much when you go to college...i don’t even know what i’ll be doing then..but we’re getting closer to that time” he paused mid-sentence 

“i know..” she sighed “but there’s a lot of people at my school..and not all of them are sweet and loving like you.”

“yeah..” he took his hand away from her face and held both of her hands “how about i promise you something?”

“promise me what?”

“..if i get uncomfortable or have a panic attack, i’ll tell you and i’ll let you take care of me.”

connie thought for a short moment, and eventually decided it was the best option to take. 

“deal.”

he laughed slightly and lay back, pulling her down with him.

“steven-!”

“whatt?”

she couldn’t resist the smile on his face. he had been so mentally drained and unstable the past few weeks, but he seemed a bit better after therapy started. she noticed these small things that had happened, and was so happy he was gradually getting better.

“connie...do you think your mom would mind if you stayed here tonight?”

smiling, she thought for a brief moment 

“she should be fine, i’ll text her in the morning”

and with that, her biscuit fell a sleep, muttering a quiet ‘i love you’ before falling into his slumber. she happily ran her hands through his hair, and hoped his dreams where full of wonder.

“..love you too. sleep tight.”


	4. helping out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> steven gets a flashback, but pearl is there to help him through it.
> 
> ( sorry, but this chapter is kinda short. i haven't had many ideas lately and have been kinda unmotivated qwq )

it was two days after connie visited him, and the dance was in approximately two whole weeks. therapy unfortunately had been cancelled, due to Dr.L being sick. he emailed her, wishing her to get well soon, and she emailed back sending him an apology and a quick ‘thank you’. he figured he would spend the day by himself.

the gems still worked at little homeschool, but steven knew that they were a phone call away if he desperately needed them, and his dad would usually be working at the car wash like usual. getting up from bed became easy, but hard on some specific days. his dreams weren’t as bad as before, but were still very extreme to the point where he would wake up in a panic. he walked down the stairs, the house having the same layout as always. not wanting to stay bored, he walked to the kitchen and grabbed himself a bowl, filling it with his usual cereal that he had most mornings. but then...

**_smash_ **

letting out a small yelp, he realised he accidentally smashed the bowl. it wasn’t a problem, right- he just had to- _pick up the pieces_ \- and _put it back together._

...

 _steven ran to the bathroom, hands in his pocket with her broken shards. rushing, he grabbed the healing essence of each diamond, as he cried. begging for her to be okay. his mind was completely broken. his tears kepy flowing and flowing_ , ** _begging for everything to be fine._** _it never was. he always put the gems before anything else, and now he shattered someone._

...

he felt himself shaking, as he grabbed his phone from his pocket to text pearl. his hands where unsteady, tears falling down. he was such a mess. why was he so weak?

suddenly, the front door opened and there stood pearl. she was already aware of what to do in this situation.

“steven..what happened?”

“....i-i..i broke..-“

he couldn’t get anymore words out, as his tears turned into sobbing, as pearl pulled him into her lap and hugged him. it broke her heart to see the boy she raised from an early age become like this. “you don’t have to tell me what happened if you don’t want to yet..please just tell me when you’re ready.” she said calmly

steven felt a sudden pang of guilt.

“t-the school...y-you where w-working, i-i-“

“little homeschool can wait, steven. you’re well-being is much more important to me than my job, okay?” he looked up to her, teary eyed and exhausted. his eyes where puffy, as he leaned into her shoulder.

“hey, how about i make you some tea and take you to bed, hm?”

she asked with a soft smile

he thought for a moment, and then decided

“...mhm...” he nodded, wanting to sleep the rest of the day off. 


End file.
